Forgiving people who have hurt you is hard. The memories of the incident or words that were spoken to you one might never forget. Although painful, embarrassing or has caused some sort of rage and pride that distance is the only option. If you are not able to speak to this person due to death or safety, that is understandable. You can still forgive from a distance. If you are able to pick up the phone, do so. They might not admit what they did wrong, but you can express how it was painful, address your part in the situation. Ask them to forgive you and let them know you forgive them as well.
Forgiving yourself. There are moments that circumstances were nobodies fault but our own actions. Recognizing our own ways and addressing our own behaviors is the first step. Freedom to expose our embarrassment or wrong choices that we would rather forget, yet haunts us. God says to cast our burdens (anxiety) unto him (1 Peter 5:7, Psalm 55:22).
"Father, because You have forgiven me I choose to forgive others, everyone who has hurt me, lied to me, or disappointed me, I forgive them and also myself. Holy Spirit help me to let go and move on. I confess unforgiveness as sin and repent of this burden I have carried, repeated as if it happened yesterday. I receive Your forgiveness and apply it to my life by forgiving myself and others. Thank You for Your grace and mercy in Jesus' Name. Amen."